Speedy, Meri & Me Martha Rose Crow

 

ACT 6: BIKE CRAZY

 

DIVA (narrating) When I first got with Speedy, he got me a bike. He asked me

 

CLOSE-UP OF SPEEDY ASKING DIVA

 

SPDY You do know how to ride one, right?

 

CLOSE-UP OF DIVA.

 

DIVA (nodding yes) I think so. I used to ride one as a kid. They say that once you learn to ride a bike, you always remember

how to.

 

ONE-SHOT OF DIVA GETTING ON HER BIKE. SHE TRIES TO MAKE IT GO AND FALLS OFF. SPEEDY IS

LAUGHING AS HE HELPS HER UP.

 

DIVA (narrating) I fell off.

 

ONE-SHOT OF DIVA GETTING BACK ON HER BIKE AND TRYING AGAIN. SHE FALLS OFF.

 

DIVA (narrating) And I fell off again.

 

ONE-SHOT OF DIVA GETTING BACK ON HER BIKE AND TRYING AGAIN. SHE PEDALS WOBBLY, BUT GAINS

MOMENTUM. SMILES AT SPEEDY

 

 

 

DIVA (proudly) Like I told you, once you learn to ride a bike, you never forget how . . . (Falls off bike again and Speedy helps

her up again. This time he looks a little worried like she is going to kill herself on it.)

 

TWO-SHOT OF SPEEDY AND DIVA RIDING BY THE SINGEL.

 

DIVA (narrating) But I eventually re-learned how to ride a bike. (Laughing) I've talked to other Americans and they told me that

when they first came to Holland that they fell off bikes, too.

 

CLOSE-UP OF A DOWNHILL BIKER ON A PROFESSIONAL BIKE. IT'S A KONA PRIMO WITH A DOUBLE

MAZUKI FORK. IT'S HANGING ON THE WALL OF SPEEDY'S LITTLE GARAGE.

 

DIVA (narrating) This is the bike Speedy is trying to build. He wants to be a professional downhill bike racer so he needs a

good bike like this one. He's a great athlete and he'd win first place, but he's too poor to buy the equipment.

 

ONE-SHOT OF A PROFESSIONAL BIKE FRAME.

 

DIVA(narrating) All he has is the bike frame. He needs the other parts, but because he helps Meri and me, (sadly) he never has

any money to fulfill his dreams . . .

 

ONE-SHOT OF SPEEDY LOOKING AT A BROKEN BIKE BY A SCHOOL.

 

DIVA (narrating) Speedy makes my bikes for me.

 

SHOT OF SPEEDY LOOKING AT A BROKEN BIKE BY THE TRAIN STATION.

 

DIVA(narrating) He finds broken bikes all over town, takes their good parts and makes us 'frankenstein' or 'franken' bikes.

 

SHOT OF SPEEDY PULLING A BIKE OUT OF THE SINGEL BY ITS HANDLE BARS.

 

DIVA(narrating) But it seems that as soon as Speedy builds me a franken bike, someone always steals it.

 

ONE-SHOT OF SPEEDY FIXING A BIKE IN HIS GARAGE.

 

DIVA(narrating) They never steal Speedy or Meri's bike, but they have to steal mine. After my plastic puke bike was stolen,

Meri and I decided to make my next bike uglier.

&nb sp;

SHOT OF BIKE COVERED IN FAKE LEOPARD FUR. A GREEN FAKE FUR IS GLUED TO THE SEAT. MERI TIES

A PAIR OF LIGHT BLUE FUZZY DICE TO THE HANDLEBARS. DIVA GLUES A PLASTIC RED ROSE ON THE TOP

OF THE WHEEL COVER AS A 'HOOD' ORNAMENT.

 

DIVA(narrating) I had that bike for a month. I rode it all over town and people turned away with horror.

 

SHOT OF PEOPLE WATCHING DIVA RIDE HER BIKE AND TURNING AROUND IN DREAD.

 

DIVA(narrating) It lasted a month.

 

ONE-SHOT OF SPEEDY MAKING DIV A A BIKE IN HIS GARAGE.

 

DIVA(narrating) Speedy made me another bike and Meri and I decorated it again.

 

SHOT OF DIVA'S NEW BIKE. FUZZY DINGLE-BALLS DANGLE FROM THE HANDLE BARS AND THE BIKE IS

COVERED WITH LITTLE SHELLS. ZEBRA FAKE FUR IS GLUED ON THE SEAT AND ON THE TOP OF BOTH

WHEEL COVERS. DIVA GLUES A PIECE OF ORANGE CORAL TO THE TOP OF THE FRONT WHEEL COVER AS

A 'HOOD' ORNAMENT.

 

DIVA(narrating) I bought my coral hood ornament at the pet store.

 

THREE-SHOT OF SPE EDY, MERI & DIVA. MERI AND DIVA ARE LAUGHING WHILE SPEEDY SHRUGS AND

HOPES FOR THE BEST.

 

TWO-SHOT OF DIVA AND MERI PARKING AND LOCKING THEIR BIKES IN DOWNTOWN ALKMAAR.

 

DIVA(narrating) My 'Elvis Goes to the Seashore' bike lasted a week until it was thiefed.

 

TWO-SHOT OF DIVA AND MERI WALKING UP TO WHERE THEIR BIKES WERE PARKED AND DIVA'S IS

GONE.

 

DIVA(narrating) By this time, I developed my theory about who was taking my bikes.

 

THREE-SHOT OF SP EEDY, MERI & DIVA EATING AT THE TABLE. THEY ARE EATING DUTCH MEATBALLS,

POTATOES AND WITLOF.

 

DIVA I think I have an idea who may be taking my bikes.

 

SPDY Who?

 

DIVAIt has to be some crazy bike thief from an alien Holland in a parallel universe. C'mon, nobody in this world is that crazy or

stupid to steal those ugly bikes. (Meri rolls her big brown eyes and Speedy shrugs)

 

DIVAI saw on TV the other day that scientists say that there is a universe parallel to this one. That everyone has a double in this

universe.

 

MERIMaybe they look like aliens. You know, green with big heads and big black almond eyes.

 

DIVA Only they're Dutch aliens from an alien Holland in a parallel universe.

 

MERI How do you know they're Dutch?

 

DIVATheir universe is in the same universe, only reverse. In a parallel dimension that exists beside this one.

 

MERI Don't you think that's a little hard to believe?

 

DIVACan you come up with a better idea? If someone around here had theifed those bikes, one of us-including Hashoe and his

boys-would have seen them by now. And they were shit bikes, too. Why would someone take them? Bike thieves around here

have more class than that.

 

ONE-SHOT OF SPEEDY MAKING DIVA ANOTHER FRANKEN BIKE.

 

DIVA (narrating) It was Meri who came up with the idea that worked.

 

ONE-SHOT OF MERI SMILING.

 

DIVA(narrating) For some reason, thieves don't like how this one is decorated.

 

ONE-SHOT OF DIVA'S NEW BIKE. IT IS COVERED WITH ROUND, YELLOW 'HAPPY FACE' STICKERS. THE

HOOD ORNAMENT FOR IT IS A PLASTIC CLOWN'S HEAD.

 

DIVA(narrating) The bike thieves hate it so bad that I don't even have to lock my bike now. They just leave it alone. I guess they

don't want to be seen riding such a happy bike.

 

THREE-SHOT OF SPEEDY, MERI AND DIVA RIDING BIKES ON THE BIKE PATH BY THE CANAL. DIVA'S BIKE

STANDS OUT.

 

TWO-SHOT OF SPEEDY AND DIVA IN BED. SHE IS WATCHING HIM READ A MAGAZINE IN BED. BOTH ARE

COVERED, BUT IT IS OBVIOUS THEY ARE NAKED UNDERNEATH.

 

SPDYOh yes, oh wow. Yes. I like that. This makes me hot. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Show me more. Oooh....

 

DIVA(narrating) Some people like to look at porno before they make love. Some people like to look at each other. Speedy likes

to look at bikes.

 

CAMERA ZOOMS IN TO SEE A DOWNHILL BIKER ON THE COVER OF THE MAGAZINE.

 

TWO-SHOT OF DIVA AND SPEEDY. SHE IS STILL WAITING AND LOOKS BORED.

 

SPDY Oh yeah. Wow. Oh baby, this really turns me on.

 

DISSOLVE TO NEXT SCENE.

 

 

 

 

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